I should go now ...

When my cell phone lights up, before the ring, I am hoping its him,
Maybe this time he has something nice to say to me this time.
My hope has run dry.

Why IS IT that i can fall for such a scumbag, for such a … MAN?

I need peace, for once, even though peace is boring,
Peace is a state of mind and I have, lately been losing my own.

I can tell a man that I meet that I don't want babies, but I do…
More than anything, I want to be a mother someday.
Everyone from back so-called "home" has kids now,
… and they are seemingly happy.


But perhaps I will never be happy,
Never be satisfied.
Is that grounds to label me "CRAZY,"
… or grounds to call me SANE?

More than anything, I want a companion.
A companion to take pictures with in the last few black and white photo booths.
I want someone to rub my tired feet at the end of MY shitty day… because they want to,
Not because I begged them to.